Dearest sisters,
Have you ever wronged someone? I'm not talking a petty wrong-doing either. I'm talking, you did something really awful that hurt someone very much. Maybe you stole something of value, maybe you skipped out on something you were going to be responsible for, maybe you cheated someone out of something. No matter what it was, I'm sure you know the feeling of regret that goes along with it. That feeling you carry, knowing you were in the wrong and you did something you shouldn't have.
I know that when it is myself, I become so ashamed! I will do a lot to avoid having to come out and apologize to the person (which is not at all something I'm advocating..). Sometimes, it seems like it hurts more to bring it up and make things right, than it does to sweep it under the rug and forget about the problem. And if you're anything like me, you know what it's like for someone to step in and help you take responsibility. For me, it's usually one of my parents. They don't hold my hand, but they do a lot to help me take responsibility for my actions. They encourage me to set things straight, and if it's a situation really bad, they will often talk to someone on my behalf and remind that person of how good of a person I really am.
You see, we all make mistakes sometimes. It's a part of growing up. It is impossible to grow up without trying to do things on your own. When you try to do things on your own, you will inevitably have to make a difficult decision and you will (again, inevitably) make the wrong decision at some point or another. And sometimes, we need other people to step in for us to clean up the mess. We don't need to rely on other people, but in some situations we do need help to pick ourselves up and set things straight.
In the book of Philemon Paul is the one "helping a brother out," quite literally. Paul praises Philemon for his "love and faith..toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints," (Philemon 5 NKJV) and personally, I think Paul was trying to remind Philemon who he was as a Christian. Sometimes when we have to make a difficult decision we need a reminder that we are Christians to ensure we will make the best decision for bringing all glory to God.
After Paul butters Philemon up a little bit, he drops the metaphorical bombshell. "I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten while in my chains.." (Philemon 10 NKJV). Based on the rest of the book of Philemon we know that Onesimus was a slave of Philemon's. Onesimus ran away from Philemon in order to work with Paul. Paul was unaware of that, but once made aware, he wanted to set things straight- he encouraged Onesimus to return to Philemon. At the same time, Paul encouraged Philemon to make the best decision possible. Paul told Philemon that Onesimus had been a strong influence on the church. He pleaded with Philemon to allow Onesimus to continue his work.
Paul doesn't ask for Onesimus to be let off completely debt free if the situation did not call for that. Paul admits to not knowing the full situation, but hear what he has to say to Philemon: "If then you count me as a partner, receive him as you would me. But if he has wronged you or owes anything, put that on my account" (v 17-18 NKJV). Paul knew that Onesimus needed to face the consequences for his actions, but at the same time, Paul knew Onesimus' worth and was willing to go out on a limb for his brother. There are so many different things to learn from this story. I will try to keep this brief!
1) We should strive to be like Paul. Paul saw the good in his brother and he also saw the bad. He did not label Onesimus based on the wrong he had done, but he did not simply let it be either. He encouraged Onesimus to set things straight. Paul also recognized his influence on the situation and strived to keep peace. He used the influence he had to help both Onesimus and Philemon.
2) We should strive to be like Onesimus. Like I said, as we all grow up (even if "growing up" takes place well into our 80's..) we will inevitably be faced with difficult decisions and we will not always make the right decision. We are too beautifully flawed to make the right decisions every time. But we should be listening to our elders and we should allow them to talk sense into us from time to time. We need encouragement or guidance to make the right decisions or make the wrong situations right. We can't be indifferent!
3) We should be willing to hear people out. I don't know the end of this story with Philemon and Onesimus but I do know that as a Christian, I am always striving to hear people out. Trust me when I say how difficult it is to hear out the girl who blatantly defamed you to her friends. It's difficult to hear out the guy who mistreated you or played you. But isn't that what we're called to do? I can almost guarantee it was hard for Philemon to forgive Onesimus for running away. But I have a feeling that Philemon knew his duty as a Christian would be to give Onesimus the same love and forgiveness that had first been given to himself by Christ Jesus.
Ladies, I have had such a wonderful week and I pray you all have too! Please, as always, feel free to leave a comment for either me (Kat) or Mia!
God bless you all this week!
Kat
"For I have derived much joy and comfort from your love, my brother, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you" Philemon 7 ESV.
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